Cynthia's Secret Chamber

Something in me has been missing for quite some time!!!!!!!!!!!
Where have my confidence gone to?! 

OMG!

I felt inferior at times! why huh? i need to regain my confidence in myself! :)

Examinations dates are drawing nearer. Where have my study mood gone to? :(
Time to sleep already.. will update on HANTING WEDDING! :)

20/09/2009 - Wedding Of HanTing and Cindy

* love is sleeping his way through, doesnt want to wake him up! :)

I should stop my thinking now!
STOP!!
now i must STOP STOP STOP! :(

i start to anyhow think again! awwww!! :(

SNOWBOARDING!


i want to try! :D

After my econs test, i sneezed all the way till lesson ended. :( Once i reached home, i started having slight fever and continous coughing.
Econs test was still beyond my control :) still able to pass :)

Tomorrow is friday already. I'll be having my Marketing test.. wooo.. till now i still haven't started studying. :(
As my fever just resided. :( This is the highest temp i have in my life, 39.2degrees! omg! never hit so high before. dont know whether i got brain damage not! :X

hopefully tomorrow test i'm able to pass :)
hopefully i recover real soon!

* love is coming back on saturday.. another 1 and a half day! :( sad...

Today i'm having my Macroeconomics Test. OOOO.. i'm scared but luckily it's MCQs!! :)

hopefully i could get a better grades! :)
i'm hungry now. awww!
i'm sick too. a lil bit sore throat, cough and running nose. hope it wont affect my thinking! :)

WISH ME LUCK...

* love is currently at Bali, awww! 4 days more... waiting for him to come back to this sunny island!!
i miss him so much! hahah! :) but it's a great time to test my patience and concentrate on my studies. :)

Many things happen recently :(

• accident on 09/09/09
• my hamster(jin mao) died on 10/09/09
• lots upset things..

My heart suddenly cant take it with all the hits in just 4days. Everyday my tears just cant stop falling down. everything seems so dull.
i'm getting depressed really soon. i need a shoulder to lean on. i think after this post i will stop doing posting of my thoughts and sorrows. :(

Since young, i am always the less blessed among my sisters.
getting more and more demoralised :(

you're leaving me alone when i need you most. what happened?

Randomly felt like blogging. So logged in!

I'm just starting to get bored over my life. Starting to get so plain and lifeless. :(

Lots of things i wanted to try in my life. Not sure when but will try definitely. :)
- Diving
- Sky diving
- Bungee Jumping
- At least 1 tattoo on my body [not sure yet cos' there's no idea picture of what i want it to be]
- START MY OWN RETAIL BUSINESS

Other things i want to do it by this year,
- Going on a Cruise
- Going to Beach Overseas to relax
- Going Taiwan to SHOP TILL DROP!

but main thing now, WORK HARDER FOR MONEY!
i want to learn now most is " stop being so sensitive and emotional, learnt up the WHO CARES ATTITUDE " :)

I NEED MORE MOOLAH! :)
Tests are 2week away from now. OMG! HELL YEA, need to start mugging before it's too late!

I WISH I WISH...

TO BE MORE HAPPY NOW.
NO DOUBTS
AND WHERE'S MY MR. RIGHT?

I NEED A PERSON WHO CAN DEPEND ON ALTOUGH I CAN SUPPORT MYSELF.
BUT AT TIMES, I JUST NEED SOMEONE TO BE THERE FOR ME.

KINDA HARD. BUT JUST WISHING...

I hasn't been blogging for like weeks.
Although i've alot of things to do, i have alot of unhappiness inside me right now.
But what to do?
Say also can't solve, might as well keep to myself. :(

Every time i told myself, whenever i'm unhappy, i will find someone to talk to or my mum to talk about.
But now, i just want to keep it to myself. All inside myself.
Like a bottle filled with my doubts, worries, unhappiness.. dont know who to share with or how to express myself.
I hope my bottle dont overflow. :( if overflow equals to anytime i will collapse. :(

If my life ain't got you. I dont know how it's like. Happy? Normal? Unhappy?
So much things i know but i just acted that i dont know. Is it the way i should be? To you, yes. To me, kind of hard to continue acting like a dumb. But i don't know how long can i continue being like this. Loving you is my choice. Although i know there's more choices out there. But i also dont know why?!

WHY AM I GETTING ALL THIS NOW?! :'(
WHY AM I GETTING SO EMOTIONAL NOW? WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME? ALL ALONG IT'S LIKE THIS. WHY?

I took a Quiz on what kind of heart i have..